Bounce Back

Recently something happened that bruised my ego a bit. I think what made it worse is that I’ve kinda been feeling a tad off on the self love end of things. Just not feeling like myself. I was in a mood about the situation all day yesterday and I let myself feel all the things, went into negative talk mode. You know that part of you that always seems to know how to hit deep to the core because surely when something happens that makes your confidence take a hit it must be because of some flaw you have. I’m not this enough, don’t have that. If I only looked like her, I’m just not enough and never will be…blah, blah, blah. I know for a fact that I am my biggest bully. Trust me I can talk about myself worse than anyone else, which at some point morphed into self deprecating humor but that’s a story for another day – I may have to revisit that.

Anyway I moped the entire day but talked to a friend who let me walk through my emotions about the situation and then went to dance class. Those two things definitely helped to ease the blow but this morning I still felt uneasy – then “bounce back” just popped in my head. It’s funny but the first thing that popped in my head was Big Sean’s song so I went and listened to it. It was a little amp for 7:30 AM but it was exactly what I needed. I will probably be listening to the song the rest of the week cause it’s doing something for me.

Let me tell you – my bounce back game has never been that good. I let certain situations consume me and play a part in how I feel about my self worth way too much. I have come a long way but it is still something that I have to work on. When the first line of the song played it was it for me – “last night took an L but tonight I bounce back.” That’s it. What happened yesterday, last week, a month ago may be an L. I’m taking an L in my confidence right now. Took an L with the little situation that happened, but I can bounce back. I might not have bounced back yet, might not happen for a couple weeks or it might happen later today. All I know is I will though. I won’t allow myself not to because I owe it to myself. I owe it to little Patience to be the funniest, cutest, happiest, most confident, softest, warmest person I can be – for myself and for anyone who gets the honor to experience my presence. I won’t let this world, people or experiences harden me even when it feels like the easier route to take. Whatever it is, that you block you’re hitting just know as long as there is breath in your body you too can bounce back.